Posts Tagged ‘lost’

Cassandra1

 

If you could see all horrible moments of the future

But no-one believed you

Would you go jitter-bug loopy?

Would you gibber ironically in frigid moonlight?

Bug shot and boasting tomorrow’s lotto results

Oh Cassandra princess of Troy

She sees the vigorous destruction of the city

Perfect prophetess

Luring Apollo with your milky breasts

Spurning a god

He curses fire and

Mind like a whole ward of twisted wreckage

Hiding in the temple of Athena

Kidnapped by Ajax

Detritus detritus he comes for her at night

With claws and fangs and a phantasmagoria of emotion

Everything mapped out iterating and reiterating

Frustrated beyond coherence

Tripped out over and rotting

Flipped past lover Agamemnon

Paired slaying as a concubine

Lost in yet to be

insomnia

 

When I can’t sleep random thoughts rush through my head

Sometimes sad, sometimes suicidal, sometimes silly

When I can’t sleep I try to meditate instead

Which helps a little but I still feel frustrated

When I can’t sleep I count sheep or breaths or thoughts

To try to sooth my mind and regulate my mood

When I can’t sleep I post on Facebook that I can’t sleep

To try to elicit sympathy and likes

When I can’t sleep

I grumble and groan like grumpy grandpa

And give the shits to everyone I meet

Because I get so agitated and anxious

When I can’t sleep I stay up all night listening to RTR FM

Or read a book

When I can’t sleep the cogs in my brain crunch and creaks

When I can’t sleep the beat of the blood brain barrier is deafening

When I can’t sleep I jerk off to relax

But I never do

When I can’t sleep my head feels like it’s full of glue

Which is neither strange nor new

Instead lost and askew

mural

Rally around all you schizoid losers and deluded users

Know truly illusion, delusion, confusion

Take each step proudly like someone who knows their own mind

Eat the pill

Until DMT day dreams manifest fields of flame and compassionate atmospheres

Floating free on winds of self-satisfaction

Meeting with aliens in conspiracies of shadows

Depth sounded depravity echoes through cortex

Corrupts beautifully like a shot of purest thai white

A hit of heavenly torpor

Getting with the flow of what nobody knows

Panics of paranoia will not confabulate my deconstructed chic

Or make me feel weak

Lost or lonely

Don’t decay- I’m not dead yet

Don’t fade like evening light

Let my neurons settle and be in each moment

Let my spine align in perfect posture

Focus on the good stuff

Let the bad thoughts pass by.