Posts Tagged ‘nothing’

christ
Twist a string of beads
Around a witch’s waist
Build a crappy tent of bulbous bones
Against the rabid rain

Which pelts poison in your brain
And soon drives you electrically insane
Nerve toxins in the neurons
Birthing paralytic rictus
And quasi simian spasticity

Beat a rubber eel upon a warlock’s wobbly bits
Signify a morbid mountain of madness
Spit upon the surfaces of suppurating melancholy
Dance into the crack within the nothing
Like a stoned fool on smack
They’ll never want you back
Until all is black as boots and empty

Taste a poxy potion of hallucinatory mushrooms
See Christ crucified with the head of a Beast
See the many horns and eyes of the beast
See the real Christ crucified in pulsating pain
See the wood of the cross multiplying across Europe
See the Shroud of Tourin photocopying a saviour
See Christ crucified on every tree
And every tree a Bible
See towering cathedrals of light hidden from mortal retinas
Fractal kaleidoscopic sun structures of infinite intricacy
Bedazzling and befuddling desperately then
Faces without eyes emerge from the void
Like fungus growing from a corpse

Flashes of spark-light phosphorescence against the windows of the skull
Mad carousing reptiles wrap their bodies around a totem pole
Wood hacked to grinning skulls piled to heaven vertical
Fire flickers and the children of light dance their circle
Drums beat a rumbling rhythm that hypnotizes
Summoning old Spirits to bring in a new age

screee

greige pile of rocks
tumbledown scree
spotted to darker grey by rain
morbid cloud-white day
sunless tedium and depression
spitting rain on rock intermittent
granite embellishment footing a towering cliff
broken rocks- pebbles to boulders
misarranged stochastic pile leans a triangle against vertical cliff
rock-fall upon rock-fall building
a home for lizards and snakes
who sun themselves on the rocks
Occasionally
whisper wind blusters the rain horizontal
rain spatters rocks to dark lead grey
caves and crevice network formed in the scree
home for night creatures
rock logic of stone on stone
impervious to reason or water-colour
too grey
too dull
too empty
we look up and dream of flagrant suicidal leaps from the top of the cliff
to splatter the greige rocks blood-red and organic
painting a more interesting image than this
greige tedium
grey-shadowing mass
of rocks and stones
fallen down to crush
nothing

chemists-own-pain-tabsules_4d717f829df4c

I take twenty Chemist’s Own strong pain tablets containing paracetamol and codeine
Dissolve in 40 ml of warm water, mix up with a spoon
The tablets melt into the water easily
Leaving a white mixture like milk
Let the mixture cool to room temperature
Then cool in the fridge for five minutes
Mix with a spoon and pour into a coffee filter on a glass
Wait till all the mixture is filtered
Drops of clear liquid from the filter stop
Throw away the filter and the white gunk
Drink the clear liquid – it’s bitter
Within in five minutes a warm feeling suffuses up my limbs and into my brain
Blessed apathy-nothing can hurt me
I just don’t care anymore
I have no anxiety
A wonderful internal hug almost as good as a real hug
Almost as good as a shot of smack
Feel so warm and heavy and cuddly
Not bad for eight bucks

Depression-1364630455-842-640x480

Sometimes the worst feeling is no feeling at all
Five days past sad
Staring at walls
Struck numb and dumb by the awfulness of it all
A desperate infinite fall
Empty of all passion
Far from compassion
Reamed out shell like an insect exoskeleton
Full of nothing
Void of love
Vegetable man
Hollow, hollow
Without purpose
Dead inside and desolate
No meaning can be formed from a mass of contradictory sensations
No drive or energy
Like a fucked up old shell of a car
Can’t get out of bed
And when a friend asks how I’m doing
I stare into the vast panoply of human suffering
And can only answer
‘I don’t know’