Posts Tagged ‘past’

balanced-rocks-1

Precarious
Life is precarious
I may start to lose focus
Start worrying about worrying
Catastrophizing and creeping towards insanity
Isn’t it important just to let anxiety go?
Watch paranoia pass into nothing
And be in the present
Not fearing the future
Or ruminating in the past
But applying conscious thought to each action
To get it together

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past

You’re caught in a past time-loop – a fly in a spider-web
Regurgitate, regurgitate
Examine your mental vomit for carrot chunks of sanity
Over and over again
Regurgitate, regurgitate
Relationships knotted in shit-flavoured spaghetti
Over and over again
Reading random papers in search of gnostic secrets
Regurgitate, regurgitate
Excavation of everything in memory for malice
Over and over again
Memory-films on continuous repeat
Paranoia builds
Stupid really

Solitude

Posted: September 17, 2014 in poetry
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

alone-heart-solitude-lonely
My self-esteem is wizened by the withering winds of change.
My heart is now corrupted and will never be the same.
The ache of solitude bites my limbs and kicks me in the balls.
Mediocrity is lurking in the corners and the halls.

The town is full of women who will never sleep with me,
The town is full of whispers of corruption and decay,
And in my secret heart’s dreams there is death and treachery.
A conspiracy of loneliness crushes love and blights the day.

The meaning of the meaning is that life is a mountain of pain:
Troubles multiply and poison everything again and again,
Pestilent people try to break into my life through the doors of perception,
Paranoia peaks through the blinds in my arcane brain.

And there is nothing to be done about it, nothing to be said about it.
Life continues in an almost infinite erratic line radiating from the centre of the now,
And every day is littered with the corpses of the past:
Until we are liberated from our festering flesh at last.