Posts Tagged ‘skills’


Sex bot my sexpot

Oh let me die in your mechanical embrace

Feeling your suction and vibration

Sex bot my sexpot

I wasn’t sure if I should get you to look like Scarlett Johansen or Winona Ryder

But I’m glad I chose Sylvia Plath

Sex bot my sexpot

I love to turn you on if you know what I mean

Let us kiss then make electronic love

Sex bot my sexpot

You have settings for vanilla and kinky

Naughty spanky fun for you and me

Sex bot my sexpot

I don’t need to have social skills to get you into bed

You don’t care about my vast vortex of desperation



After work drinks while I was working as a shipping clerk
Whole office in a pub in Northbridge
Five beers
Improved social skills
Feel relaxed and engaged talking to beautiful women
Ten beers
Not so many social skills
Starting to be a bit of a dick
Starting to repeat myself
Fifteen beers
No social skills
Slurred speech
Load of toads squirming and whirling in my brain
Pissed as Bukowski, I stagger off from the pub, collapse in an alleyway on James Street and fall asleep
Wake up early in the morning surrounded by graffiti covered walls on cold bitumen- my head hurts like I have been hit between the eyes
There is a weedy little guy with a beard and a shit-eating grin on his face staring at me
When he can see that I am awake he says:
‘I sucked your dick while you were asleep’
I am struck dumb and numb by shock
Not a good feeling- paranoia ensues
I get up and walk briskly away towards the train
At least he didn’t fuck my ass

Once again I’m in a condition of too many women and not enough social skills
OT honours students have invited me to an end of year party
So many pulchritudinous women that my brain rolls back in my skull and my balls clench back up into my body
Social workers there as well and you can tell them from OTs.
OTs are straight and the social workers are urban pretentious hipsters- my kind of people
Like poets
I am transformed to a heightened state of social awareness thanks to several pints of stout
I converse with them all and they are all friendly, smiling and pure, but I don’t sense any sexual tension or moments of intimacy
I have a fantastic time even though there are too many women and not enough social skills
One of the girls takes me home
I ask her if she wants to meet my guinea pigs
She says no.